Wow, so where to begin? Well since my last blog I have gone through some trying times and some great times, but even through everything I still see God answering my prayers on a daily basis. I know He's answering them in His time, even though I can't see it sometimes. God is good all the time, but sometimes I wish all the time was now! Stretching is a complicated process.
Ever since I was little I've taken dance classes. I was one of those little girls who loved to dance around, but could never remember what I was doing. I laugh at myself now watching old videos of dance recitals, where I'm the one on the end watching everyone else and a couple of seconds behind. Yet, no matter how eager I was to dance at class or at recitals everything started the same, stretching. In order to not hurt ourselves and to warm our body's up to the fast paced movement, we all had to stretch. Stretch our arms, our legs, our necks, our toes, our fingers, our backs, everything you could think of we stretched. Back then stretching didn't hurt. I was flexable, I was little, I was durable. Now, however, I stretch from getting out of bed and it hurts. haha.
This seems slightly scattered but stay with me.
I think this is a big reason God says we're supposed to be like little children. Because children don't have a problem with stretching. If they know something good is waiting they'll do just about whatever if they know they're getting a reward. Why do we not do that? Why do we have trouble saying 'hi' or even just smiling at strangers when God tells us to? "Oh God no, I can't say hello to them, what will they think?" HELLO?!?!?! REALLY?!!? I've had a child who I have no idea who they are wave at me and say hello, for no apparent reason other than I WAS THERE. Anyway, on a deeper level sometimes God tries to stretch us spiritually by presenting us with opportunities to seek reward. He doesn't always tell us the reward, only what we must do to obtain it, and yet sometimes we doubt Him. As if He's lying, and He's going to pull the rug out from under us in the middle of stretching and leave us akward and alone. Uh...I think not.
Anyways, I was on a rant about this, but now I'm done, before I started. So I hope this gets through to someone. I don't know, maybe it was just for me. The world will never know.
6.20.2010
6.08.2010
Sweet Summertime.
'... perfect song on the radio, sing along cause it's one we know, it's a smile, it's a kiss, it's a sip of wine, it's summertime.'
Ahh, the smell of the ballfield, the heat of the sun on my back, ice cold cola in my hand, flipflops, and shorts, welcome back summer, it's been too long.
I love the feel of summer. The lack of stress about assignments for school, the freedom of doing whatever whenever, the life and love that seems to linger through the air as kids play ball and run around without shoes on. So many times I feel bad if I don't do something with my summer. Ah it's so nice staying up late, sleeping in whenever I want, going and doing whatever I want (for the most part atleast ;) hah) whever I wanted. Trying to get tan, burning and hurting.lol. Running around barefoot, anticipating the Fourth of July and all the fireworks. Swimming until I pruned, and running around in the sun to dry off and enjoy life.
These are the things that make summer great. Summer 2010 Bring it on.
Ahh, the smell of the ballfield, the heat of the sun on my back, ice cold cola in my hand, flipflops, and shorts, welcome back summer, it's been too long.
I love the feel of summer. The lack of stress about assignments for school, the freedom of doing whatever whenever, the life and love that seems to linger through the air as kids play ball and run around without shoes on. So many times I feel bad if I don't do something with my summer. Ah it's so nice staying up late, sleeping in whenever I want, going and doing whatever I want (for the most part atleast ;) hah) whever I wanted. Trying to get tan, burning and hurting.lol. Running around barefoot, anticipating the Fourth of July and all the fireworks. Swimming until I pruned, and running around in the sun to dry off and enjoy life.
These are the things that make summer great. Summer 2010 Bring it on.
6.07.2010
Beauty Restored.
'I am beautiful no matter what they say, no words can't bring me down. So don't you bring me down today.'
Confidence in a girl when it comes to her appearance and image is hard to find these days. Which really if you think about it is very sad because so many young women are so very beautiful and yet we see them starve themselves or run themselves thin trying to get skinnier, taller, thinner, more popular, and in their own opinion more beautiful. I've always been one of those girls who could preach to my friends about their self image and self worth. I can remember early on in my childhood telling my friends that they were really pretty and shouldn't worry so much about their appearences; however, whenever I'd be alone looking in the mirror I'd self conciously pick out my own flaws and degrade myself little by little.
Years later I chide my friends for worrying about their appearance and again later on I find myself picking out my own flaws as well. Not many people ever knew or know now that I've always been self concious about my own image. In fact, I've so cleverly and convincingly desguised it that many people are envious of me thinking I don't face that issue. I've often thought the same of people who have preached to others about having a negative self image.
Well I'm here to tell you that that exact thought is terribly inncorrect. Ever since I was little I've always been called beautiful or pretty and never really believed it. I think it might have something to do with the fact that I've grown up around all boys for the most part in my family and never really had a female figure in my life to show me how to wear make up an arch my eyebrows. I knew my cousins wore makeup and such, but sometimes whenever I looked at their lives (having kids out of wedlock, and not seeming to be happy) I always thought that I didn't want to be like them so I didn't try to look like them either. Now, I look back I'm still glad I didn't make that choice because it would have put me in positions that I wasn't mature enough or ready to be put in, and at the same time I wish they hadn't worn so much makeup and stuff to hide their natural features. I've seen them all without makeup and they are all very beautiful people and it hurt my self image to see them put so much on to try and be happy and yet never achieve happyness.
Now I look at my life and my appearance after hearing so many sermons and preachings about self image, hearing myself childe people so many times, and praying and listening to God; I can look at myself in the mirror at night before I go to bed and appreciate my inner beauty as well as my outward beauty. I can look in the mirror and instead of seeing my frizzy hair I can appreciate my contagious smile. God as restored my heart and my eyes so that I not only see my inner beauty but so I can appreciate His creation. Me.
Confidence in a girl when it comes to her appearance and image is hard to find these days. Which really if you think about it is very sad because so many young women are so very beautiful and yet we see them starve themselves or run themselves thin trying to get skinnier, taller, thinner, more popular, and in their own opinion more beautiful. I've always been one of those girls who could preach to my friends about their self image and self worth. I can remember early on in my childhood telling my friends that they were really pretty and shouldn't worry so much about their appearences; however, whenever I'd be alone looking in the mirror I'd self conciously pick out my own flaws and degrade myself little by little.
Years later I chide my friends for worrying about their appearance and again later on I find myself picking out my own flaws as well. Not many people ever knew or know now that I've always been self concious about my own image. In fact, I've so cleverly and convincingly desguised it that many people are envious of me thinking I don't face that issue. I've often thought the same of people who have preached to others about having a negative self image.
Well I'm here to tell you that that exact thought is terribly inncorrect. Ever since I was little I've always been called beautiful or pretty and never really believed it. I think it might have something to do with the fact that I've grown up around all boys for the most part in my family and never really had a female figure in my life to show me how to wear make up an arch my eyebrows. I knew my cousins wore makeup and such, but sometimes whenever I looked at their lives (having kids out of wedlock, and not seeming to be happy) I always thought that I didn't want to be like them so I didn't try to look like them either. Now, I look back I'm still glad I didn't make that choice because it would have put me in positions that I wasn't mature enough or ready to be put in, and at the same time I wish they hadn't worn so much makeup and stuff to hide their natural features. I've seen them all without makeup and they are all very beautiful people and it hurt my self image to see them put so much on to try and be happy and yet never achieve happyness.
Now I look at my life and my appearance after hearing so many sermons and preachings about self image, hearing myself childe people so many times, and praying and listening to God; I can look at myself in the mirror at night before I go to bed and appreciate my inner beauty as well as my outward beauty. I can look in the mirror and instead of seeing my frizzy hair I can appreciate my contagious smile. God as restored my heart and my eyes so that I not only see my inner beauty but so I can appreciate His creation. Me.
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